Monthly Archives: August 2008


how to lose

My friend, Jodi, lost her dog today. I felt a certain love for Molly because she looks like my Cleopatra, who is old and sometimes lame. I am always worried about my family’s fragility when […]

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scale stories

My daughter weighed herself at 8:30 p.m. I tried to stop her; everyone knows it’s bad to weigh at night, and this night was even worse than most. She’d eaten dinner late because of soccer […]

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rocker mom

My daughter likes me to be there. “There” is wherever she is—whether it’s on the field at soccer, in the swimming pool, or in the band room at rock school. She’s not content with on […]

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The last week of summer vacation is one of the hardest weeks to be a parent or a child. You both want to cram it full of devil-may-care- ness, go from swimsuits to pajamas (the […]

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a special note to stephen colbert

I know what you need. It is soft and moist. It’s suh-weet. Getting it only makes you want it more. It’s the perfect way to end a meal or start a day. It’s the climax […]

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memory foam

the bed has come between usfurniture and issuewhen night comes on.while you sleepthe blue angels bustthe sound barrier.while you sleepthe lumberjackwhizzes saw bladesand my dreams go boomand poof—I wake in the next room. bedroom wallshave […]

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when we were bad, it was very, very good

As you know, I touched Kip Winger. And though my inner rock star is fighting with my outer groupie over this event (“touching Kip Winger? You should have been singing with Kip Winger, slut-ho-beyotch!”), the […]

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read this post in the bathtub—on your laptop (but be sure it’s plugged in and immersed in your bath water)*

The recent warning from the American College of Emergency Physicians has me ticked. Must common sense always be optional? Can’t our coffee and our Pop Tarts be piping hot after they are prepared without our […]

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you know you have a fun job when you’re being paid to touch kip winger

I met Stacy in a bar last night while I was working. She told me I have a fun job. Stacy and her husband, Larry, paid two grand so that Larry could spend the day […]

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